Transcript of Michael Rapaport on Chelsea Handler, Kevin Hart & Roast Culture
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0:00Have you beaten this with a dead horse0:01on your podcast? What did you think of0:03the Kevin Hart Kevin Hart one?0:05>> even talked about it.0:06>> What did you think of Kevin Hart the0:07after that?0:09>> Go ahead. First of all,0:12I'm trying to get Sheryl on the couch.0:15She's great. Okay. Sheryl's a co-worker.0:18I'm with her all the time on Funny You0:20Should Ask, Byron show, okay?0:22>> Oh, you started doing that?0:23>> Yeah. The best. It's my man right there.0:26I [ __ ] with Byron. He's going to take0:27over. We got to get you in cuz he he's0:30going to take over all of the wood. You0:32watch.0:32>> He should.0:33>> He he's but he's0:35The number one thing for Byron is is it0:36funny?0:38He loves business and all that, but0:40he cares more about jokes than anyone.0:42>> Really?0:42>> He's a comedian at heart and that is it.0:45He just happens0:45>> to see him back in the days at the0:46Improv.0:47>> Yeah, he just happens to be real people.0:48He just happens to be a billionaire now.0:50>> Remember he was on that show Real0:51People?0:51>> 100% he was 18. Eddie Murphy said that0:53he wanted to be like Byron.0:55>> Damn.0:55>> I know. So, check this.0:57>> That's sick. Like Byron, if I could be1:00like Byron1:01>> I haven't talked about it. So, here's1:03the situation.1:06I'm glad you asked this. It's so crazy1:11how the community and I'm talking about1:14comic,1:16okay? Comic, all right?1:17>> talking about the black community.1:18>> talking about comic, okay? How crazy1:23they are at each other, which you just1:26never would see before.1:27>> Ever.1:29>> And let's just give a shout-out to Sarah1:31Silverman who said something either on a1:33pod or maybe one time back green room, I1:35don't know. She said it and it's it1:37lives in my head. She goes, "Nothing1:40comes before the joke."1:43Not money, not a relationship, not your1:45beliefs. The joke is tantamount1:49paramount, whatever it be.1:51And I was like,1:52that's a true1:55comedian mind.1:56>> Pure cute pure She's a pure comic.1:58>> Yeah, so when she said that like people2:01need to go back to what she said.2:05Because2:07that is the truth and it's like you're2:09on a roast. Now there's some [ __ ]2:11jokes2:12that make me uncomfortable.2:14>> Right.2:15>> Like you know2:17I could tell you them but like2:19>> But there's some jokes that don't make2:20you uncomfortable that make other people2:21uncomfortable.2:22>> 100% but I'm never like I'm like yo but2:25that's [ __ ] up. Yo that's [ __ ] up2:28but I'm never going to impune your right2:30is that the word to tell them?2:32>> Especially at a roast.2:33>> Never. A live roast. And like people are2:38coming for Kevin like yo Kevin like2:41Kevin Kevin's like the biggest supplier2:44of jobs like and a lot of black people.2:48Okay, but like2:50people are mad for people at jokes that2:54the people that the jokes are on aren't2:55mad about.2:57>> It was just Now where do we go from here3:00with the roast?3:01>> Well first of all first of all3:02>> Let's roast the roast.3:04>> It's like come on man. I when these3:06comics act like they're hard and [ __ ]3:07and I'm I see them I I've seen some of3:10these comics on their tweets.3:13>> [snorts]3:13>> [ __ ] baby legs bro.3:15I mean they're so charming. I'm like3:17don't ever act like you're hard because3:19you're charming bro.3:19>> Tweeting about the [ __ ]3:20>> Yeah or like going on pods. So but like3:24Chelsea3:25like I don't even want to talk [ __ ] cuz3:28I don't want to be in her crosshairs.3:30But yo she made her living [ __ ]3:33taking down everybody and all of the3:35sudden she's clutching her pearls.3:38Like3:39dude.3:41And the dais was mostly black.3:44Am I wrong? And a lot of women.3:47>> 500%3:48>> Yeah, like where are we at?3:50>> And if you had receipts on this comedian3:52and I got DMs from this you know, about3:54this girlfriend, why did you show up in3:56the first place? If they're such [ __ ]3:57bags.3:58>> Yeah.3:58>> Cuz I I you asked me about Bassem4:00Youssef, right? I say [ __ ] that. No, I'm4:03not showing up.4:04>> Yeah.4:04>> No, I'm not, you know, debating. No, I'm4:06not speaking.4:06>> Well, you mean you have integrity.4:08>> No, I'm just saying like if if that's4:09how you feel4:10>> a line.4:11>> For me, I do. Like if if if she heard4:14these things about I don't know which4:15one it was, Shane or Tony Hinchcliffe or4:16whatever, why did you show up?4:18>> I can't believe First of all,4:20>> the roast go from here?4:21>> Comedy Central roast was just as4:23intense.4:23>> Brutal.4:24>> Brutal.4:26Um I mean,4:28you can't have them if4:29>> Shut it down.4:30>> Yeah.4:30>> Or4:32shut it down. I say we have to shut it4:33down because people's feelings are going4:34to get hurt.4:35>> Bro,4:36low-key,4:38this is almost like4:40a Will Smith slap moment.4:42Like that [ __ ] was so crazy that he did,4:47okay? And I ride hard.4:50Pause for Will Smith.4:51>> Right.4:53>> But now,4:54I ride harder for Chris.4:56>> Right.4:57>> Okay?4:57>> Right.4:58>> And4:59I worked with both of them.5:01>> Right.5:02>> The roast5:04is like they're acting like that.5:06Like they're acting like5:09they're in their feelings. It's like5:11>> I don't like some of the [ __ ] jokes5:13either. Guess what?5:14>> You had a chance to go over them. They5:16got approved.5:18>> Even if you do approved, there's no5:20approved. These are This is a roast.5:22>> Yeah, and but it is a roast.5:24>> This is what we do.5:24>> Yes, this [ __ ] is a [ __ ] roast.5:27>> I mean, I I could just say for me5:29>> What happens with a roast? You get5:31charred.5:32>> [ __ ] talking, snapping.5:34>> Yes, snapping hard.5:36>> Hard. And this is what it is. And these5:37comics are all like like you know, when5:40you see like5:41>> To me, the hardest one is the Pete5:42Davidson. Like the [ __ ] that they say5:44about him and his dad a fool.5:45>> And and and and you know,5:47>> He can take it too, but I just feel like5:48that's [ __ ] crazy.5:49>> When you see like when you see comedians5:51like Kevin Hart or I know Marlon is bad5:54[ __ ] ass with the snapping. Like I'm5:56talking about snapping. I'm not talking5:57about Marlon Wayans or Kevin Hart the5:59star. I'm talking about how they became6:00comics. Imagine what Kevin Hart was like6:03as a as a 11th grader in school.6:05>> Yeah, snapping.6:06>> You like it's like being able to like6:07it's like being an MMA expert. Like6:09he'll [ __ ] you up with that [ __ ]6:11Marlon, too.6:13>> 100%.6:13>> Obviously Tony Hinchcliffe, Chelsea,6:15Chelsea, too. They chop you with the6:17words. And then they can't do what made6:19them famous.6:20>> Yeah. By the way, Chelsea seems6:22offended, but she can snap. She can6:25snap.6:26One time here6:27>> Who cares that you Why isn't 50 Cent6:30talking about [ __ ] you? Why are you6:32still talking about 50 She goes dated.6:35Did he ever say dated or was that was6:37that like6:38I'm not going to speak for 50 Cent. What6:39I'm saying is like why are you talking6:41about I'm a Who cares who you [ __ ]6:44Who cares6:46that you [ __ ] 50 Cent 20-something6:48years ago when he came on your show and6:50was like, "Yo, this6:51this lady wants to give me some ass."6:53That's that's what I think it was. She's6:55like, "What Curtis?"6:56>> Wait, I'm confused. Is she's mad about6:58that?6:58>> No, but she's like she went on a whole6:59tour and you know, her whole thing and7:02like like you know, afterwards and she7:04was with Deon Cole who's another one. I7:05would imagine what if Deon Cole, no7:08cameras, snapping.7:10>> I know.7:10>> This is HIGH-END [ __ ] IT'S LIKE7:12>> CHICAGO.7:12>> This is like if you're like you get7:15Steph Curry, Jaylen Brunson, LeBron7:18James, Kevin Durant and the7:19>> saying world class snappers.7:21>> And you there's like there's no cameras7:23and you let these [ __ ] just7:24ball. That's like bowling. That's not7:26that's not playing in the league.7:27>> Lifetime Fitness.7:28>> Snapping.7:29>> Okay.7:29>> These guys are [ __ ] in This is the7:31world class.7:32>> Okay. So you're7:33>> And I was good and I know there's a7:35level to it.7:35>> Yeah. So you're saying that why are they7:37snapping on each other?7:39>> No, I'm saying this is what it is. This7:40is what we paid for. This is why the7:43budget was whatever the Jeff Ross is a7:44[ __ ] animal.7:46>> Yeah, animal. Animal.7:48Animal. Like to your face though.7:50>> Chelsea's an animal.7:51>> Animal. She's an animal.7:52>> These are all animals.7:53>> Animal.7:53>> We can't get upset about it.7:55>> That's a compliment.7:56>> I'm saying a savage. Like these are7:57top-tier [ __ ] These are all7:58animals.7:59>> cuz Chelsea can hold her own.8:02>> Right.8:02>> Let's just take this just take female8:04comic on8:05>> And then she's like oh they're8:05misogynistic and they're racist. But you8:07went.8:08>> But also Chelsea can beat she can beat8:11down comedians man.8:13Yeah, she's great.8:14>> She's she's one of the8:15>> her props.8:16>> Yeah, I'm giving her props. So like it's8:17like8:17>> Why is she in her feelings?8:19>> Yeah, you don't go. So where do we go8:21from here? Is there any way to get out8:22of this?8:23>> And right. And Cheryl's the one that was8:25getting8:25>> He's not in his feelings.8:26>> Right. And and so it's like you know and8:28>> Kevin's not in his feelings.8:29>> No. And he had to defend himself in this8:31and the the George Floyd8:33>> He's on a yacht right now.8:34>> He not thinking about this [ __ ]8:35>> No.8:36>> But this is also part of the time8:37because we all have platforms.8:39Everybody's got a [ __ ] podcast.8:41There's so many you know influencers or8:43whatever the [ __ ] you know in you're not8:44influencing me to do [ __ ] There's so8:46many commentators about everything. And8:48this is how I like Draymond Green, we8:50know how he gets down.8:51>> Yeah.8:52>> He'll [ __ ] you up. He was laughing.8:54>> Yeah. Yeah, Draymond Draymond laughed.8:56And he's a Detroit brother.8:59>> He he We know how Draymond gets down.9:02>> Yeah.9:02>> Like he Draymond's on that edge. Well,9:04he's still in the I think Draymond will9:06evolve into a uh um a Charles Barkley9:102.0. But while he's in the NBA, it's9:12like um he's still in it. It's like it's9:15like you know like football players,9:16boxers. It's like you know when they9:18retire, you see them sort of9:20you know9:21like Michael Jordan never was able to9:23give it up. Tom Brady was like I don't9:24want to be this lunatics. Now he's9:26self-effacing. He makes fun of himself.9:28Michael Jordan, he's still in the last9:30dance. Like yeah, that [ __ ] You9:31know like he didn't put his sword down9:33for a long time.9:34>> Mhm.9:35>> Draymond he he might put his sword on. I9:38think he will.9:38>> Draymond's a gangster. He walked through9:408 Mile by himself.9:41>> He's 6'8".9:42>> Yeah.9:42>> He he made a a Hall of Fame career not9:45being able to shoot, not being able to9:48He made it off being tenacious, knowing9:50the game, whatever. I don't I'm just9:51saying they all laughed.9:53>> Yeah.9:53>> And and some jokes when they say, "Oh,9:55the the Zionist, the Jew." I'm like9:57But I but but like the other jokes9:59>> come for the Jews?10:00>> They say when somebody made a joke, but10:01it's like10:02everybody's got a thing where they're10:03like, "This isn't cool." It might be10:05George Floyd, it might be the Jews, it10:06might be Pete Davidson's family.10:08>> Epstein.10:09>> Any any of it. It doesn't matter.10:11>> That's a tough one right now for you10:12guys.10:14>> When you say you guys, you mean who?10:16>> You know who.10:18You know who.10:20It it Epstein Epstein You got to get him10:22out. You got to take him out.10:24>> And the name Epstein.10:25>> Yeah, Epstein.10:25>> It couldn't It couldn't have been like10:27>> It couldn't have been like10:28>> something that's more ambiguous.10:30>> Yeah, like10:30>> Like a more ambiguous Jew. It's Epstein.10:32>> William William Berg.10:33>> Jeff Jeff Jeffrey10:34>> William Berg.10:34>> Epstein. Like there's no way around it.10:37>> Stein might be more Jewish than Berg.10:39>> Stein is10:40>> You know what You know what it is.10:42>> Yeah, you know what10:42>> Everything works in front of Stein.10:44>> Looks like you just heard like Kamala10:46>> You know you know, but Stein you could10:47put anything in front of it and you're10:49like, "Okay."10:50>> Wait. Go back Go back to the roast.10:53>> Hot Stein I mean anything works.10:56>> Jefferson Stein like oh like oh like10:58there10:59>> Yeah.11:00>> Michael Jackson Stein like it's Stein11:02you're you're11:03>> Patrick11:05Couch Stein.11:06>> Like you can Stein is your Jew.11:08>> That's a Jew. Listen.11:11I want to say this.11:14>> I know you must have been a nasty11:15[ __ ] snapper.11:16>> I snap at moments. Jeff Ross11:21Pour some out Greg Giraldo.11:24>> [snorts]11:25>> These are world-class animals, okay?11:28Um11:30And and and and and and Chelsea I want11:32to give her her flowers because she she11:34is a world-class snapper. Yeah. But I11:36don't know why she just got sent to11:38Tivo.11:39>> Cuz she's evolved. She's she's evolved11:42and she slept with 50 Cent.11:44She [ __ ] 50 Cent and she she she11:46>> She slept with.11:47>> Be so aggressive. She She talks about11:50it. This is her language.11:51>> Okay.11:51>> Curtis. For her it's Curtis.11:53>> in a She had a relationship with Curtis.11:55>> Yes.11:55>> Okay.11:56>> And that means something.11:57>> But what did that have to do with her11:58not liking roast?12:00>> But you know, they they're racist,12:01they're misogynistic.12:02>> Tony gives everybody chances on the12:03show, so that's just wrong to say.12:07So it's like, what are we talking about12:08here?12:08>> What are we talking about?12:09>> What are we [ __ ] And Sherrod is going12:11around saying, I'm good with it all. And12:13Sherrod, thank you for your service.12:15>> Don't you think it that it's racist12:17because she can't advocate for herself.12:19She needs to tell Sherrod12:20>> That is racist.12:21>> Exactly.12:21>> That is some [ __ ] racist Chelsea has12:24to advocate for Sherrod.12:25>> She has to advocate for Sherrod.12:27>> You know what I call that? Berkeley12:29[ __ ]12:30>> Yeah.12:30>> That is some [ __ ] granola eating,12:33gluten-free12:35>> true true racist [ __ ]12:36>> in 202612:38racist [ __ ]12:40>> Yeah. She Sherrod Underwood doesn't have12:42the agency,12:43the advocacy, or the self-worth to12:45advocate for herself. She needs other12:47people to do it for her. And don't cut12:49that cuz you don't [ __ ] with me, but12:50that's12:50>> 100%.12:52>> That's the most racist [ __ ]12:54>> Speaking on Sherrod's behalf.12:57>> She can't do it herself. Yeah. She's not12:59smart enough.13:00>> That is truly racist.13:02>> enough. She's not confident enough.13:04>> to be the literally white knight.13:07>> Blond.13:08>> Blond, blue-eyed to protect you from13:11these misogynistic devils.13:13>> because I [ __ ] 50 Cent.13:15>> [sighs]13:16>> I could do it because I I [ __ ] 50 Cent13:19and other black guys.13:20>> she had a She had a relationship with13:21Curtis.13:22>> She had a relationship She No, she said13:23dated Curtis.13:24>> Okay, she dated Curtis.13:25>> She dated Curtis. And I I [ __ ] Chelsea,13:28but you know, she13:29>> Not after this clip.13:30>> The reason why The reason why I could13:31say all this13:32>> When's the last time you saw her?13:33>> I never met Che- Chelsea.13:35>> You said you [ __ ] with her.13:36>> I'm a fan. I'm a fan.13:37>> did her show?13:38>> Never did her show, but I'm a fan. I did13:41her podcast, but it was on Zoom.13:44I did I I think it was during COVID or13:45No, it wasn't even COVID. It was just,13:47you know, when we all started doing Zoom13:48[ __ ]
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